When was the last time you should do something, you didn´t and to feel better, you start convincing yourself, why it´s a good idea you avoid this action at all?
That, my friend, is an excuse. People use excuses to rationalize their actions regarding their circumstances.
However, excuses are usually the biggest reason why people can´t accomplish what they always wanted in life.
In this article, I am going to share with you 5 ways how to stop making excuses and finally get what you want.
Let´s dive in.
A few years ago while I was struggling in my life, I didn´t know what finally help me. Then, I came across the 67 Steps program from Tai Lopez and it changes my life.
This program contains 67 lessons from the most successful people in the world to improve every major area of life – health, wealth, relationship and happiness.
I was super pumped, I couldn´t wait to see the first lesson. I thought it´ll be about something like planning, working hard, communication or any other necessary principle for success.
But, all this lesson was about 1 ability. The ability to be honest with yourself.
From this 47 minutes video I realized, that…
Let´s say, today you ware supposed to work on your side business. But, you procrastinated and you didn´t.
So, to not feel bad about yourself, you´ll make up a story about why you couldn´t work today. Why it wasn´t possible.
Or, in other words – an excuse.
The worst thing about excuses is that deep down, you already know, it´s a lie. And when you repeatedly lie to yourself, eventually, you´ll start to believe all these lies you are telling to yourself are true.
These lies aren´t here because they´re supposed to help you become better in life. It´s just a temporary relief for yourself, so you´re not angry and disappointed about yourself.
When you believe all these excuses are true, it´ll be impossible to become successful in life.
So, firstly start being honest with yourself. Only then, you can find the problem and figure out the solution.
There was one man, who had 2 sons. This man was the representation of what many people called a horrible father.
He was a drug addict, he was in jail several times and he was beating his sons up almost every day. But, after these sons grew up, they both chose a different life.
One of them became a complete copy of his father. Also, a drug addict, an alcoholic who ends up in jail.
Although the second one has a great relationship, 2 kids, a great job and he had a happier life, he could ever imagine.
When someone asked these 2 sons, how is it possible, they have this kind of life? They both answered the same:
“What else could I have become, having grown up with a father like that?”
A different people, different lives, same answer. The difference lies in the story they tell themselves. One of them focused on excuses while the other one focused on finding a solution.
From what we already covered, we know that you´re making an excuse probably because you are lying to yourself in order to feel better.
As Tony Robbins says: Life is not happening to us, it´s happening for us.
Every decision you make comes from your belief system. To change your life, you need to change your decision. And to change your decision, you need to change your beliefs.
If you believe you are just a victim and everything that´s happening in your life can´t be influenced by you, then you´re either:
And I have no idea, what´s worse from these 2 options.
In order to stop making excuses and start living your life by your own terms, you need to believe you´re the only one who´s responsible for your life and that you´re in control of everything that happens to you.
So, when the next problem appears and you´ll catch yourself making up excuses, do the 1 following thing:
If you want to learn detailly, how to set your beliefs, check out this great book form Tony Robbins – Awaken The Giant Within.
As I already covered, when you think someone else is responsible for your life, you´re most probably lying to yourself. (And someone who lie to yourself, is doomed for failure and sadness).
I truly started to understand how important is to take responsibility for my life, when I was going through this great book Extreme Ownership.
The title of extreme ownership shows the main idea behind it – you need to own everything. (no, not steal everything 😊). You need to own every problem that appears in your life.
Something bad happened in work? The first idea should be – How could I prevent it?
Something bad happened in your relationship? First idea – What could I do differently (not my partner).
I could go on and on, but you already see the point. When you are responsible for your actions, only then you can come up with a solution.
So, while others waste time casting blame and focus on the problem, you´re fully focused on a solution. You do that because you know, only you are responsible for what happened, not anybody else.
Let me ask you something:
What kind of person do you admire more? Someone, who admits the fault, or someone who always casts blame on someone else?
Not just by taking responsibility and owning your problems you´ll become more productive, you´ll earn much more respect than someone who is always a „victim“.
When you´re interested in more leaders principles, check out the Extreme Ownership book and learn from best combat leaders in the world.
Lastly, one of the biggest reasons why people make excuses is that they don´t want to be embarrassed in front of other people.
I am sure, you as well as me, are guilty of this. Who would like to be embarrassed in front of other people? Mainly, when it´s your family and friends.
The problem is that this kind of thinking makes us slaves. You can´t do what you love, because you´re afraid of what will other people say.
You can´t admit your faults, because you´re embarrassed, what would other people say.
All of that is a vicious circle. You are afraid that someone else would laugh at you so you rather make up an excuse.
You’re making an excuse, but by doing it, you aren´t honest with yourself, you don´t learn from your mistake, and you´ll do this mistake again.
And what you do then? You´ll not admit it again. Why? Because you´re afraid of what other people say.
The only way to break this circle is to stop thinking of other people opinions and start focused on yours.
So, try to care less about others, do what you love, admit your fault, learn from the mistake, stop making excuses and you´ll become much happier, productive, respected and successful.
Excuses prevent you from living the life you always wanted. If you make an excuse, you let someone else decide what your life is going to look like.
What is absolutely essential for finally stop making excuses is to start being honest with yourself.
If this doesn´t help you, continue to change your beliefs, change the story you´re telling to yourself and eventually, you´ll change your life.
You should also not let other people dictate your life. Take responsibility for your life, own the problems and take control over everything that happens.
Only then, you can live your life like you always wanted and become more productive, happy, respected and successful.
If you want to learn all the necessary, proven principles for getting the life you always wanted, click here and take a look at 67 steps and learn the principles of the most successful people in the world.
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What is your most common excuse? Leave a comment below! 🙂